Where is my home? Is "home" in Cali or Washington? Since coming back to Santa Rosa, I've struggled with not viewing my time in Santa Rosa as something that will be temporary. You'd think that I would feel like I belong here by now...I mean come on, it's only been EIGHT FREAKIN MONTHS! I've been pretty confused. Until now. Haha.
I've been listening to a song called "Do You Know the Way You Move Me?" There's a part in it where God is saying "I saw it when you left your friends/family behind." The first time I heard this song, it was like God was saying that He saw it when I left everyone in California in order to pursue Him in the Master's Commission. The next time I heard it, however, it changed to where He was saying that He saw it when I left my friends and family in Washington to pursue His plan. But finally, I recently listened to the song again...and I realized that He was saying that He saw it when I left it ALL behind. Washington, California, whatever. He saw it. And it moved Him. He doesn't care which "home" i'm leaving behind...it's just the fact that I'm willing to do what He asks me to do so that I can pursue His Heart.
During the last two weeks, Father's taken me through a bit of a process. I'm finally starting to get it. Thank You, Jesus. I've always struggled with contentment-I have a hard time being satisfied with where God has me because I'm always looking for what's next. Yeah, this can be good to some extent, planning for the future, but it means that I often miss what Father wants to do in my life RIGHT NOW!
I've been realizing how much I truly love it in Santa Rosa. At first I thought it was just the amazing weather...but no. It's so much more than that. It's home. Maybe it will only be for a couple years, but this is where Father has placed me for this season. I don't need to live in the "maybes" of tomorrow...I'm HERE TODAY because He has a ton of amazing plans. Yeah, I miss everyone in Washington...but do I want to move back? Honestly, no. It's funny how God can change a heart so quickly. But yeah, I can't imagine being anywhere else than where I am right now. It's just right. Because it's HIS PLAN. Awesome. I may be back in Kirkland for a while, someday, but it's all about His Plan. And the sunshine. And the beach. =).
